Dear Gabe,
Five years ago tonight I was sitting on a bed, exhausted and confused. And exhausted. Really exhausted. Have I mentioned that?
Why? I was a mother. A brand new mother. Fresh from the delivery room with a whole new identity. Who had no clue how long to feed you and who couldn’t change a diaper [...]
Dear Gabe,
One thing I’m sure you know about me is that I’m nothing if not overdramatic. But I really mean this when I say it – today was one of the worst days of my life. It might sound like it on paper, but there’s nothing overdramatic about that statement in reality. Nothing precipitated this [...]
Dear Gabe,
I’ve wondered about this day. I’ve wondered about this day for around four and a half years. I’ve wondered if this day would happen. I’ve wondered how old you’d be. I’ve wondered what you’d say – how it would come up. I’ve wondered when you’d understand. I’ve wondered [...]
Dear Gabe,
I always love being your mother. I always love you. Sometimes you get into funks that are hard to manage… hard for me to navigate. I hate not knowing what to do. It’s hard. But then things like what happened today happen, and I feel a sense of peace that it’s all going to [...]
Dear Gabe,
You turned 4 a few weeks ago! In keeping with my apparent tradition, I am writing this letter late – much too late – but I am writing it nonetheless. As I’ve told you before, the letters on your birthday are hard for me to write. As much as I love seeing you get [...]
Dear Gabesy,
I love you! I came down with the flu yesterday, and this had you quite perplexed. Dad tried to explain it to you, so before you went to bed you came over to the couch to snuggle with me. It was so nice! Today, Grandma Robins took you to Walgreens, and while you were [...]
Dear Gabe,
Happy birthday! Today is Wednesday, November 21st, but I wanted to make sure I got your birthday letter done this year! And I was reminded to write your letter today because we’re under a snow advisory for our first snowfall of the season. In 2004, we had our first snowfall of the [...]
Dear Gabe,
I haven’t listed tidbits about you in a while now, so I thought I should catch up!
* You mostly wear 3T clothing. I just noticed some of the pants are looking a bit short on you. However, I can still pull them off you without unbuttoning most of them; you’re pretty thin!
* You are [...]
Dear Gabe,
I decided I would keep all my letters to you on a separate blog. I have weirdly irrational fears that if I died you’d never see my letters to you because they’d be lost amidst the rest of my journal entries. I know… I have issues.
Right now you’re upstairs. Dad just gave [...]







